Packing it on
I'm up to 135 pounds today! woo hoo. That means I've gained 10 lb baby-weight of which 1 lb is baby and the rest, apparently, is boobs and belly. All my weight is forward, I still look relatively normal from behind. Bring a winch if I fall down cause I won't be getting up again any time soon! I already have to roll onto my side to sit up, or do this wierd diagonal lurch if I'm sitting on a really bottomless couch. I can't see my toes any more. It's all very exciting.
I'm still pathetically behind on getting the house ready (nesting hormones) and I've already ranted about being fit (labouring hormones) so now I think I'll pontificate on eating (nurturing hormones). I haven't had any food cravings until yesterday, when I HAD to have mashed potatoes or ... well, I wasn't brave enough to resist the craving. I probably would have been driving to the Wendy's window for a potato at 3am. That's where a hubby or male counterpart of some kind would really come in handy. hee hee. I can see it now:
Moi: Get me a potato!
Him: it's the middle of the f--- night!
Moi: (brandishing nearest baby rattle) get me a potato NOW!!
Him: okay okay just don't point that thing at me!
(staggers back an hour later with piping hot potato)
Him: sweetie, wake up, here's the potato!
Moi: zzzzz ... snore.... wha?! oh. ....eww. it smells wierd. I can't eat it...just put it in the fridge, honey, thanks. ...snore...zzzz
Him: (to self) I'm going to kill her. I'm going to kill her. breathe, count, breathe, count... thank god for those birthing classes...
I'm still pathetically behind on getting the house ready (nesting hormones) and I've already ranted about being fit (labouring hormones) so now I think I'll pontificate on eating (nurturing hormones). I haven't had any food cravings until yesterday, when I HAD to have mashed potatoes or ... well, I wasn't brave enough to resist the craving. I probably would have been driving to the Wendy's window for a potato at 3am. That's where a hubby or male counterpart of some kind would really come in handy. hee hee. I can see it now:
Moi: Get me a potato!
Him: it's the middle of the f--- night!
Moi: (brandishing nearest baby rattle) get me a potato NOW!!
Him: okay okay just don't point that thing at me!
(staggers back an hour later with piping hot potato)
Him: sweetie, wake up, here's the potato!
Moi: zzzzz ... snore.... wha?! oh. ....eww. it smells wierd. I can't eat it...just put it in the fridge, honey, thanks. ...snore...zzzz
Him: (to self) I'm going to kill her. I'm going to kill her. breathe, count, breathe, count... thank god for those birthing classes...
posted by zouzou at 11:48 a.m.
4 Comments:
Like I said last night... Enjoy that potato... I'm sure you'll burn it off once you meet up with your trainer on Thursday! (Can you tell I'll be waiting with baited breath on Thursday for all the details?)
As for the weight... umm... dear - YOU'RE PREGNANT! You're supposed to be gaining weight!
And besides, 135 lbs. is my **dream** weight and if you keep nattering about how big you are at that weight, I'll be forced to clobber you... baby or no!
Love ya...
If you're looking for something to fill the gap while you're waiting, have you considered stand-up? I got a really good chuckle out of your dramatizaton! This being pregnant could be fun... for me!
Hee hee. I'm not really complaining, Sarah, I am just REMARKING upon the weight gain, more as an achievement than a complaint. yeah, that's it. I do want a healthy bouncy baby, after all! (just not an 8 or 10 pound whopper)
I just tried something that should keep your bundle of joy good 'n' healthy! You gotta try the fruitcake, girl!
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